GETTING BELOW THE SURFACE Blog 1
HOW TO RELEASE THE PAIN OF THE HEART AND PUT OFF THE OLD SELF
It is easy to see what the icebergs look like above the surface of the sea-ice in the picture above. However, there is much more to icebergs below the surface which we can’t see unless we take a deep dive.
It is the same with us as humans. We can easily observe ourselves and others on the surface. We can see what someone looks like physically and we can observe their behavior. The person might be outgoing and friendly, or shy and reserved. The person might display peace in stressful circumstances or explode in anger. All this can be observed on the surface.
However, we can’t see what beliefs the person is carrying at the heart level, or the emotional memories they may be carrying at the cellular level. In fact, we ourselves might have no idea what heart beliefs we are holding that may have been formed way back when we were children in a painful situation. It’s kind of like the auto-pilot of our heart was set back then, and it’s influencing the direction we’re going in life!
Having been made in the image of God we humans were created for relationship. We have legitimate longings to feel loved, accepted and appreciated.
For example, I once spoke to a young lady who had trouble making close friends. She was now in her twenties and the story finally came out from when she was nine years old. Her best friend had betrayed her. It caused her deep emotional pain and the auto-pilot of her heart was set to believe it is dangerous to trust people. She didn’t want to risk going through that pain again, and here she was years later experiencing loneliness.
Now think of Lars Peter’s testimony in Arctic Light. The auto-pilot of his deeply wounded heart led him right to the brink of suicide. The pain of our hearts can bring us to a dangerous state of hopelessness. But, like Lars Peter, you can be set free!
The Bible says in Luke 4:18 (KJV) that Jesus came to heal the broken hearted and preach deliverance to the captives. Look at this verse below.
Isaiah 53: 4, says Surely he (Jesus) hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.
It says Jesus has borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows. Did you notice this is past tense? In other words it has already been accomplished for us. Freedom from overwhelming emotions like grief, sorrow, fear and shame is a free gift offered to us through the gospel of Jesus Christ. Gospel means good news! This is the grace of God shown to us. Grace means unmerited favour. Our response is to simply believe it, that’s a faith response.
For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: 9 Not of works, lest any man should boast. Ephesians 2: 8 (KJV)
21 Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior. 22 But now he has reconciled you (made you friends with Himself) by Christ’s physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation— 23 if you continue in your faith, established and firm, and do not move from the hope held out in the gospel… Colossians 1:21-23 (NIV) Wow, this is one of my favorite passages of scripture! I often quote these verses as I approach God seeing myself holy and acceptable before him in Jesus.
The primary way we activate the gifts of God into our lives is by faith. Just deciding to believe God’s word. But the Bible also says, “faith without works is dead” (James 2:17) This seems like a contradiction to Ephesians 2:8 above, but it is not. Ephesians 2:8 is telling us we cannot earn salvation through good works, but James 2:17 is telling us that works (action) is an outcome of faith, and activates our faith. From here you are going to have an opportunity to activate your faith. If you choose to believe Jesus took all your sorrows and sins on the cross, you now have opportunity to send them out of your life by faith, and activate your faith like Lars Peter did.
In Arctic Light Lars Peter said he forgave his abusive step-father. But he didn’t just say he forgave him, he put his words and faith into action by actually going to his step father, giving him a hug, and telling him, “I forgive you!” Do you remember what he said once he forgave? He felt a love he never felt before, and he didn’t go back to his old life. These kind of actions are not the basis for our approval before God, but these kind of actions certainly help establish our sense of identity in Jesus.
The process of releasing emotional pain has to do with FORGIVENESS. Forgiveness is often misunderstood, but in the Greek forgiveness means “TO SEND AWAY”. Take your authority as a human being made in the image of God and send away the shame, fear, disappointment, anger, unbelief, hopelessness, destructive beliefs and vows because they have no legal right to be in you. Jesus took all your sorrows, and now you are taking authority over all that by faith.
(PAUSE: If you start to feel overwhelmed with emotion even thinking about getting in touch with the pain of your heart, hold off at this point until you have set up an appointment with a good friend, counsellor or spiritual mentor who can sit with you in a caring manner as you continue with the process below. In the meantime go for a long jog, have a cold shower or help someone in need. But determine to carry through with the put- off/put-on exercises, you’ll be so glad you did! (Psalms 55:22)
Now, if you’re ready, let’s continue:
Before you do this exercise, think of a particular disturbing event that happened in your childhood (like the young lady whose best friend betrayed her, or like how Lars Peter’s father abandoned him on the dock all alone) Now, assign specific words as to how that experience made you feel (shame, fear, hate, anger, betrayal, sadness, loneliness, revenge…). One man said to me, “It has been so helpful to put words on my feelings!” Now you know specifically what you are releasing.
Also acknowledge, and write down, the DESTRUCTIVE BELIEFS and VOWS you have identified in yourself as a result of that traumatic experience in your early life. Here are some examples; I’m powerless, I’m worthless, I’m not important, I’m a failure, I’m a mistake, I’m incompetent, I’m hopeless; and VOWS; I will never trust, I will not let people close to me, I must bury my feelings, I must always make others happy, I must always be blamed…
A young man I spoke to one time confessed; “I met my abuser on the street the other day, and beat him up!” And then he asked me, “How do I get rid of this anger?” Our sin is often in response to how we ourselves have been sinfully been treated.
Anger and hate are sins, and like any sins they’ll always squeeze us into an unhappy place if they are not released out of us. The verses below, and many others, have been given to mankind for our freedom and healing.
Isaiah 53:5
5 But he (Jesus) was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him, and with his stripes, we are healed.
Now look at this amazing verse:
“For he (God) hath made him (Jesus) to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in him.” (2 Corinthians 5: 21)
God the Father is offering us this incredible exchange through the painful sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the cross.
Our sins and pain - for Jesus’ righteousness and peace.
It is a free gift offered to us at great price. We simply accept it by faith as a free gift, say thank you, and step into the kingdom of God and a new way of living.
Here is an exercise many have found helpful for activating this wonderful gift into our lives.I
1. Take those pages you have written the feeling words, lies and vows on.
2. Go outside and dig a hole in an appropriate place for a small fire, and have a pail of water nearby.
3. Put those pages in the hole
4. Acknowledge the pain and sorrow associated with those words.
5. Read Isaiah 53:4 & 5 out loud from the heart
6. Light the pages on fire
7. Observe the smoke going up, and with it, the pain of your heart and your old life.
8. Put lots of dirt over the smouldering ashes and douse it all with water.
9. Now, turn away from that hole of ashes
10. Step into the kingdom of God, your new self and a new way of living:
“Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.”
(2 CORINTHIANS 5:17)
You are a new creation in Jesus, which means you have a new identity, and that is the subject of BLOG 2.